Priestess, empress, queen: these are people who instill admiration and respect. Success, joy, beauty, strength. Queens have it all because they know how to wield their inner power. Gender titles aside, learn how to queen up and find your golden crown.

What Is a Queen?

A queen, priestess, or empress is a highly-evolved human who knows the value of generosity, reciprocity, intention, and authenticity.

You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.”THE WIZARD OF OZ

They don’t suffer fools. They know to handle difficult situations with grace and courage. The only speak when they have something to say.

The Traits of a Queen

The traits of a true queen, priestess, or empress are as neverending as time itself. Here are a few thoughts on traits native or cultivated by queens:

When You Speak, People Listen

Your appreciation of silence leads others to respect your thoughts and words. People listen. When you speak, you speak with intention. You are the rumbling roar of all those who cannot speak and your back roar echoes in space so that your words are remembered. More than remembered, your words are deeply integrated into the psyches of others. As natural leaders, queens are capable of initiating difficult conversations that others avoid. 

You Know When to Be Silent

Sometimes princesses babble in nervousness or awkwardness. The fear of being disliked or even sitting is silence is unbearable for princesses. Queens use silence to their advantage: in the silence, the answer lie. Through the reactions of others or through intuition alone, a queen gathers valuable insight in the quiet in-between moments of life. 

You Know When to Walk Away

This doesn’t mean you are walking away or turning your back. Rather, walking refers to that moment of clarity where you know nothing is going to change except your presence. The only way to instill change in these situations is to move on, move forward, and make room for what is to come. 

You Seek Reciprocity

While a generous heart is a telltale sign of a real-life queen, you acknowledge that reciprocity is integral to a Queen’s survival. A queen understands the delicate balance of giving and receiving. A queen can do both with grace. Protection and boundaries are critical aspects of your queenship: your energy is important and you actively practices routines that rejuvenate your passion and joy. 

You Know Your Worth

A queen know’s her worth. Her crown may not be visible, but when she enters the room, you know she is wearing it. She has self-respect, acts in integrity, and values her own time and resources. A queen is humble yet proud. Proud of creation in its very essence, for you an embodiment of the Divine. Even when others question your worth, your confidence in your divinity is steadfast, though you may not know your purpose or what the path before you holds.

You Seek Allies When You Need Them

Self-love and embodiment of her power are the natural states of a queen. Yet, she also knows when she is out of balance and may seek allies to help her regain her perspective. A queen does not act alone: a queen garners the thoughts and opinions of confidantes but always makes the final decisions in her life, without blame.

Renowned Queens Through the Ages

These queens and empresses instilled loyalty, courage, admiration, respect, and even fear in people and civilizations throughout the ages. Here are a few queens to inspire your journey towards queendom: Queen Nefertiti, Mary, Queen of Scots, Cleopatra, Catherine the Great, Queen Liliuokalani, and Zenobia of Syria. 

Six Practices to Help You Queen Up

Now that you understand what it truly means to wear the crown of a queen and adorn the responsibility of a priestess, here are six practices to help you queen up:

1. Breathe Before Responding

Take three rounds of deep inhales and exhales before responding to difficult situations or encounters. Use your breath to clear your mind and heart. Can you respond in a way that does minimal harm but gets your point across? You can even play the “see who talks next” game. Often your silence will lead to information and 

2. Follow Your Heart

Learning to follow your heart may be difficult for some, especially if the wishes of others tend to overrule your internal guidance. Ultimately, you are responsible for your actions and happiness. Following your bliss is the first step to understanding your destiny in life. What lights you up? What brings you joy? Ask yourself these three questions before embarking on any action or quest:

  1. Does this action benefit someone else
  2. Does this action benefit me?
  3. Do I want to do it?

If you answer “no” to any of these questions, walk away.

3. Create a Power Object

Designate an object that you may infuse with your individual power. You may wish to choose something less conspicuous than a crown, staff, or magic wand. Try a pen, stone, or even an eyeliner that you can wear when you need it. Meditate with this object and infuse it with your queenly essence.  When you wield this object, know you are supported by Spirit and may speak your truth.

4. Holster Your Crystals

While Queens of the ages had to prepare and engage in literal war (some Queens still do) modern times may call for spiritual armor. Crystals may double as power objects, but you can also call upon traits or energies born from the earth, such as strength, intuition, and clearing. Try clear quartz, selenite, or rubies. Remember to clear and cleanse your crystals with water or moonlight.

5. Call in Your Guides

No queen acts alone. They are advised, supported, and protected by confidantes. Spirit guides, whether animals, ancestors, talismans, or mythological archetypes, you can invoke the energy of these guides simply by calling on them. If you really need to rally the spirit troops, try a ceremony or journey. Light a candle, write a letter to your guide, or even embark on a meditative journey to their territory for guidance.

6. Ground Down to Grow Roots

Queens find their strength through groundedness. When you feel lost, confused, or afraid, find a comfortable seated or standing position (preferably barefoot) and connect to the earth. Imagine roots growing from your feet or sacrum: these roots are large Amazonian roots, thick, wild, and grow in all directions for miles. Once grounded, let your limbs, leaves, flowers, and fruit grow.

Queen Up: The Gold is In the Journey

The journey to Queendom is arduous and filled with challenges. Most of all, the journey itself is rewarding. Have patience if you take a step backward into princess-land; you may still have lessons to learn. Queenship comes from experience and wisdom.